things I have to say...

I have a few things I need to say, I have been focusing mainly on the bad things that have been going on and I'm sure there is plenty of good. I have never been the most positive person and I am trying. There were many amazing things that happened on our trip, like the ocean, it is the most amazing thing in the world, I could see it everyday and still marvel at it's wonders, the way the sun sparkles off the water, the way the waves build up then come crashing into shore spraying you with a refreshing mist of cool water. Even though the beach house had only two bedrooms for 10 people it was still so awesome to be able to look out your window and see the ocean. I have to thank my friends who have been giving me support, and I can assure you that I am safe and well. While my stepdads three kids and him intrude in on our close packed family, us five children and my mom are intruding on theirs. We are all having mixed feelings I'm sure. I apologize if I worried any of you, I was very caught up in the moment when I wrote those blogs, I cannot tell you that I did not feel hurt, but it was not as bad as it seemed. My mom tells me it will take up to seven years before we could feel like a real family, that seems like a long time. I don't know if I will ever be willing to to fully except the step siblings into my life, but they are in my life, a part of it now and I have to live with them, I only hope I can find a way too...